OUTSIDE LINKS   Bruce Boyer at Cigar Aficionado Clothes and the Man by Alan Flusser Gentleman's Quarterly Chic Simple Dress Right! YOU'LL WEAR WHAT I TELL YOU TO WEAR 1. The Autodidactic Dandy "Say there, young fella, can I ask you a question? Do you think this tie'd go with an olive suit?" Everywhere I go (in the case above, Macy*s), people (in the case above, an old man) ask me for my opinion on clothing. Whether because of my personal style and grace, or because I look like I work there, I do not know. These questions flatter me, but they are also troubling; they remind me that many people do not know where to turn for fashion advice. How can this be? you ask. Today's world is a world of information, a world of surfaces. How can there be a dearth of information about surfaces? It is this conundrum that we will examine in today's column. There are three principal sources of sartorial wisdom: 1. Fashion magazines. Fashion magazines are a great way to find out what other people think is fashionable. Their utility is somewhat limited, however, because most of the articles are essentially advertisements. For example, a column by the incomparable G. Bruce Boyer in last month's Cigar Aficionado reads as either an ad for Brioni or a fascinating, informative, historically valuable ad for Brioni. Occasionally, fashion mags do try to pass along some useful tips, but more often than not this information is recycled from another source, with only errors added. For example, in an article on socks a few months ago, GQ mentioned that one popular sock design had "classic clock faces." This is a rather surprising bit of news, unless one assumes that the lowly GQ staff writer assigned to write about socks based his article on reference works that mentioned "clocks" without defining the term. This is the equivalent of a political reporter omitting the first "Boutros" in "Boutros Boutros-Ghali," thinking it was a typo. One would hope that anyone writing about "clocks" would have seen them at least once in his life. 2. Glossy fashion books. These books (for example, the current Chic Simple series) are gorgeously designed. The better volumes are packed with examples of well-coordinated outfits. But examples are not enough: if you don't own the clothes they depict, they are difficult to implement. And with the passage of years, the outfits will look rather dated. These books are fun but frustrating. (The casual visitor to their web site may notice that their fun, attractive, four-page section on wardrobe "Assets" contains exactly one piece of advice: Black is versatile.) 3. Well-written fashion books. The best fashion books concentrate on theory, not practice. Such books are written by two men: Alan Flusser and G. Bruce Boyer. Each man has published several books, and all of the volumes I've seen are worthwhile. The advantage of theory is that it lasts over time. Once you understand how accessories are supposed to compliment a suit, you can accessorize for the rest of your life, using whatever items are in style. Another advantage of theory is that it helps you look better using what you already own. Once you understand the role of socks in an outfit, you can select the most appropriate socks from your collection for any occasion. An example covers only one specific case; the general theory of socks covers all hose past, present, and future. 2. Snazzy AND Solvent After learning about clothes, your first impulse will be to spend ten-thousand dollars so that you can dress like Cary Grant. Please restrain yourself for a moment and ponder this universal truth: you are not Cary Grant. You are you. Your dress should be based on your identity, and on those elements you wish to accentuate for the world to see. Cary Grant was a wealthy movie star, and dressed like a wealthy movie star. You are not. There's a difference between wearing clothes that flatter, and wearing clothes that lie about who you are. It's fun to dress like a rich guy and fool strangers, but there's no point in dressing like someone else on a daily basis. (If it's fun you want, you'll have more of it dressed as a pirate than a rich guy.) So forget buying a closet of glen plaid suits. Instead, use your current wardrobe as the raw materials of your new and improved one. Think of the clothes you own as a piece of wood that you will be carving. Use what you have as much as possible. Your current wardrobe already expresses who you are, if crudely, and all that remains is to polish and refine your wardrobe. First, go through everything you own, editing out a few items and bringing the most versatile pieces to the front of your closet. Then, size up the gaps in your wardrobe and spend a few bucks filling them. You might want to buy the right pair of shoes, or some perfect socks, or an extra dress shirt. When buying something you've never owned before, consider buying the cheapest brand available. That way, if you end up hating that glen plaid suit, you're only out $100, and the thing will fall apart before too long anyway. If you love that glen plaid suit, you'll have had plenty of practice wearing it by the time you cough up $1500 for a good one. So educate yourself, but keep your wallet closed. You'll look great and still have money to spend on all the beautiful women you now attract.

--Mike Benedetti